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Parenting

Aggressive child

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Ayushi Narula

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Sep 11, 2013

"Hi fellow parents. i am a working parent and that is why i am not able to spend much time with my kid. I have been observing lately that my son is becoming aggressive. He gets angry and shouts and throw his belongings if we do not entertain any of his wishes. Please suggest how to handle. "

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Leena Tharian

| Sep 12, 2013

whether u r working or not, this is common in 4-6 yr olds. Reason: they are learning to assert themselves and it becomes aggression ! Don't come down harshly on the child. Try negotiation, persuasion, move him/her out of the scene, threaten a bit (with a pinch etc) and bring them back to the same situation. Tell them what is proper way of assertion. By 6 years a child knows what is acceptable behavior so then you won't face this problem. Relax!

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Shikha Batra

| Sep 11, 2013

Hi Ayushi! I completely agree with Dr. Mittal. Agression is a form of behavior which children exhibit to express themselves mostly when their demand are not being fulfilled. It s advisable to answer these q's first -- since when this behavior change has begun, has any other major change in child's life has happened during this phase? What is that is bothering the child? When is the behavior more displayed like in front of father or mother or sibling, when parents are back from job or dinner time? It is quite possible that the child is missing his parents and wants to spend time with them and share how he spent his day, what he did in school, what happened to his friend etc. since he is not able to open his heart out n misses his parents this could be form of retaliation. Generally working parents fulfill all the demands of children as they have the guilt feeling for not being able to spend much time with them. So child gets used to it n on being denied of fulfilling his demands this behavior could be evident. It is suggested u cud talk it out to ur child calmly and explain to him how he is hurting himself and parents in this whole process of creating scenes. How family's functioning is disrupted becuase of this behavior. N not giving up to his demands and being firm on good behavior would finally bring a change. Please try n spend more time during weekends n keep calling in between to enquire about his well being. All these gestures would make him feel he is being loved and cared for..

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Dr Mittal

| Sep 11, 2013

Hey Ayushi. This type of behaviour is part of natural development of growning children. It is something that will outgrow with ur help. Firstly calm them down. Move them out of the scene, Make them apologize, and explain the desirable behaviour. Do this repetatively. As the time moves on he will slowly understand how to change the behaviour.

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