my child is 4. 5 yrs old but is very stubborn... he just wants to do what he wants.. he communicates with us.. but does not listens... what ever means is adapted to consel him,all are wane.. on making him set his routine or telling him to study or if we change the manner in whuch he has arranged his toys ,then also he starts to shouts... pls tell how to control him??

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Updated on May 26, 2021

child-psychology Corner

Answer:
Children at that age are discovering that there are many things they can do by themselves and when they achieve what they want to do they feel very successful and nice about themselves, this in turn increases their confidence and self - esteem. Many a times when they are not given the space or time to explore they may get stubborn. They could also get very stubborn if there are no boundaries drawn for them and they have been having their way all the time. Therefore it is important for you to assess the situation and understand, if he is getting stubborn because he has always had his way, or is it because he feels that he is being controlled a lot. When it comes to studying, he may not be interested in it as he may not be motivated and may find it very difficult to sit for long to study. It is important to teach him through play way method where you are being creative, and making studies as part of a game. The more he is pressurised to study, it may create an uncomfortable atmosphere and this may lead him to detest studies. So creating a welcoming, stress free atmosphere is very important. At this age the child may not be able to sit for more than 15 min at a stretch to study. So it is important to break down the studies into chunks of 10 to 15 minutes. During studying pointing out to him when he has done his studies in a proper manner is very important. This will tell them what they have to do rather than what they should not do. First praising him for the things he did right and then telling him how to correct the mistakes is very important. Also if you feel that his stubbornness is too much or that he is getting angry very often, consulting a paediatrician with this issue to rule out any physical reasons is recommended. Take care.

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