my gal is 5 yrs old ...she is intelligent and hyper active ... she always share things with her friends and more attracted by friends than family.. but she is hesitating and afraid when her friends beating her.. and she is showing that in home.. she is afraid to point the person who beated her too.. she is observing things fast but its tough for us to change the wrong observations that she get from outside .. my main concern is even if we tell her in positive way politely she is answering in reverse way or negative way... sometimes she is crying for something and even though we console her in very soft manner she is not at all listening and answering in a negative manner and making us to lose our patience... example. : even if I allow her for 2 hrs to play she will not return when am calling ..once she come back if I warn her , sometimes she s calm and listen. most of the times she will talk opposing my words co ntinuously... if I get irritated after losing my patience then she starts to throw things and screaming badly ... if i couldn't control her and if I beat her then she become more aggressive instead of calm down. don't know how to increase her listening and understanding capacity . please suggest valuable inputs here... also kindly help me by explaining how to handle these kind of kid and change her negative thoughts and reverse way of talks.. also I observed that she s not sleeping that easily... she is disturbed and keep on pressing her legs long time during sleep. is she disturbed in her mind or do I want to send her to yoga??? What kind of ideas I need to follow to make her social and good listener and to avoid negative thoughts on her. kindly share.education Corner
As parents we are the primary role models Children learn to do as we do and Not as we say. Hence if you get angry and be aggressive your child is learning that aggression is ok and it gets things done. Hence I request you to be patient and role model the behaviour you expect. Children exhibit such behaviour when they want attention. For them attention is equal to love. Understand her needs and interests and be supportive. Regarding bullying : If this is happening at school please confide in the teachers and seek their help to put an immediate stop. If it is at home or in the family, observe how your son is responding. Teach her to be assertive: example 1. To look into the eyes of the bully and say loudly STOP IT. 2. Move away from the situation 3. Immediately seek the help of an elder nearby. 4. At home create a game where you and her play. The game should be on power and control. So you pretend to be a monster and you are trying to catch her. Please make sure the game is fun and not to instill fear. when she is escaping or trying to put up a brave stand, praise her and say,' oh my you are so powerful. .. Through such games and even stories you can subtly teach her how to be assertive. Sometime she may express his fears indirectly or directly. Be a good listener and help her understand her emotions. All the best and do keep us posted.