ADHD How to cope up

Live Chat - ADHD - How to cope up?

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Swapna Nair

ADHD - How to cope up?

Swapna Nair, Parent Child Therapist


Jul 21, 2017 | 5 : 00 PM to 6 : 00 PM

Children tend to be active and always on the move jumping from bed to sofa to back to sofa with a nary a worry of getting hurt. It is their nature to be active after all who does love a lazy child? As parents you also want your child to be dancing around and having fun.



And here comes a catch!!!



When the elders in the family feel that the child is not at rest and lacks focus and attention. Did that get you worried? If not much maybe a little... but the thoughts like does my child has ADHD — do start crossing your mind and you feel helpless with not much support from the family members. You read up on the internet and you get all the more confused.



But do you really know whether your child is acting his or her age or is there an underlying problem of ADHD?



Consider this: Your child is active and is good in studies as well then he or she is showing the normal behavioural pattern, however at the same time there is another child who is also active, but behaves impulsively, and lacks attention and focus and is always moving from one thing to another. Should the parent worry?



Hence it is important to know the symptoms of ADHD also known as Attention Deficient Hyperactivity Disorder.



This does not mean that your child is not normal! It simply means that he or she is not well and needs to be treated by a doctor. You can start by understanding what is ADHD, how it affects the brain, the symptoms and the coping strategies.



If you are keen to know more, here's your chance:



REGISTER NOW for a LIVE CHAT with SWAPNA NAIR, and get “ADHD Smart" in 60 minutes.



What you stand to gain?



1.   Knowledge on “what is ADHD"; "difference between hyperactive and ADHD"; "how to deal with your ADHD child” and so on

2.  Tips on how you can best handle your ADHD child in a calming way

3.  Learn from queries of the parents with concerns for their ADHD child and the solutions provided by our eminent expert.



Reach out to an expert and know all about “ADHD". Click and queue up your questions, right away!



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My 4 1/2 year old son had problem in socializing, speaks very less, not paying attention in class. w....

My 4 1/2 year old son had problem in socializing, speaks very less, not paying attention in class. we showed him to doctor, she said he has adhd, now he is taking ot classes and also special education classes. There is progress but in a very slow speed. I want to know what should i do for his better future, i am very much worried about him.

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Swapna Nair
The progress will be slow. it is nothing to do with his intelligence. His brain will work differently. What is most important is that you and your child have to work as a team. . 2017-07-20 17:05:07
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Swapna Nair
There is no use being worried now. you have to be mentally prepared to be very strong and happy so that you can take care of his needs. You have to be very supportive of your child 2017-07-20 17:05:51
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Swapna Nair
You may not be able to make the task easier or more interesting. But there are ways you can encourage your child to get started on it: • Acknowledge that the task may not be something she’s enthused about even though it’s important. 2017-07-20 17:06:35
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Swapna Nair
• Help your child keep track of homework materials and deadlines, and figure out the time needed for each task. Prepare a checklist and hang it beside his desk or door. This lsit will help in doing his chores 2017-07-20 17:07:31
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Swapna Nair
• Avoid nagging or arguing about him doing his task. Try to keep emotion out of it. 2017-07-20 17:07:58
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Swapna Nair
Use Reward, not Punishment 2017-07-20 17:08:22
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Swapna Nair
Children with ADHD usually crave positive attention . For example, your child is moving around and making silly noises while you are helping him with homework. Ignore the behavior and say, “Let’s see how fast we can get this work done.” When he settles down you can say, “Wow!, you are really working hard and look, we’re almost done now.” 2017-07-20 17:08:57
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Swapna Nair
Young Children with ADHD Respond Well to Touch Most kids with ADHD need lots of physical contact. Love them by touching them, hugging them, tickling them, wrestling with them Reward your child with praise, good words, smiles, and a pat on the back as often as you can. Minimize distractions. Minimize any distractions before giving directions. Turn off the TV. Ask your child to put down his game or book. Make sure he’s looking toward you. Speak quietly.- Your child may be able to focus more easily on the substance of what you have to say when he doesn’t have to process the tone and the volume, too 2017-07-20 17:12:01
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Swapna Nair
Check for understanding- Ask your child to repeat your directions back to you. Or ask him to explain your directions in his own words. Tell, don’t ask.- don’t give options. Just tell or instruct what you want them to do. Give instructions one at a time. Number your directions- Say things like “There are three things you need to do,” or use words like first, second, then, next and last. Be precise in what you say- Be specific. For example, you may get better results by saying, “Please put your clothes away, pick up the toys from the floor and make your bed” instead of “Clean your room.” Use visual cues – follow what I am doing and then do the same. 2017-07-20 17:12:33
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my son is 8 yrs ,has much grasping power,intrested in mechanism of things,but less intrest in studie....

my son is 8 yrs ,has much grasping power,intrested in mechanism of things,but less intrest in studies,getting complaints from teachers,lack of attention in class,talkative,doing whatever he wants....

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Swapna Nair
He may be just hyperactive. try out these concentration techniques. Ask him to pick out a certyain letter -example 'e'- from a paragraph. Listen to instrumental music and pick outthe different musical instruments or any one instrument. Use the non dominant hand to scribble o na piece of paper. 2017-07-21 17:04:43
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Swapna Nair
Before sitting to study yo ucan make him do this Since his attention span is low, allot time slots of 20 min study + 5 min break. during the break ask him to try out the concentration techniques. Even colouring a picute is good to bring back focus 2017-07-21 17:05:43
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Swapna Nair
He likes to learn by doing and touching so you will have to allow him to learn similarly. He can make diagrams out of the concepts. Use spider diagram to teach him topics. Have a stress ball next to him. He can be allowed to walk and read. make him a standing desk. Then he can come to his desk, stand and read ; walk around or play with stress ball and then come back to read. 2017-07-21 17:07:47
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hi my son is 2.6 years old but till now he did not start talking only few words like muma and didi.a....

hi my son is 2.6 years old but till now he did not start talking only few words like muma and didi.and always want to jump didi not pay attention when u call him. he also did not mix up will other children we consult to the dr also he said that there is adhd issue i am a bit confise.what to do plz help

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Swapna Nair
Do not worry. Children will overcome this as they grow. He will be 30% slower than his peer group in socializing or emotion management. What is important is that you haveto be extremely PATIENT, ACCEPTING AND SUPPORTIVE. Work as a team. Share your concerns with his teacher. Tell them to have him seated close to the teacher's table facing his back to the class. He has to have minimal distractions. 2017-07-21 17:10:52
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Swapna Nair
What you can do:Simple Ways to Improve Your Child’s Focus Give directions while playing catch. To help your child improve focus, try giving him directions while passing a ball back and forth. Ask him to repeat the directions every time he throws. Play “Freeze! Focus!” Try playing a round of the game of “Freeze! Focus!” When he’s least expecting it, say, “Freeze! Focus!” and have him freeze in place (start with 10 seconds and build your way up). When time is up, ask him to describe three things he saw while he was frozen. Eventually, you can put up signs around the house that list rules and chores and ask him to focus on them while he’s frozen. Make memory musical. Try creating a tune to letters while your child is spelling out a word. Clap and chant to a beat to accompany the natural rhythm of your child’s chores. Experiment with your child’s favorite songs for a fun, low-stress way to build concentration. Do all sorts of puzzles with your child. Make the day into a story. Many kids love to be the center of attention. Ask your child to describe his day as if he were recalling a favorite book or movie, with him as the main character. This can help your child internalize his daily routine and the people who have leading roles in his life. 2017-07-21 17:11:47
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Swapna Nair
Kids with ADHD tend to be disorganized, with messy rooms and overflowing lockers and backpacks. That means they often can’t find the important items they need for the day, such as homework, phones, house keys and calculators. Tip: Putting together a checklist of the next day’s activities and the things your child will need can help him keep track of his belongings. 3 Finishing Chores Your child may have good intentions when it comes to doing chores, but that’s usually not enough to get the job done. Kids with ADHD have a hard time finishing what they start, especially if it’s a multi-step task. 2017-07-21 17:12:17
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Swapna Nair
Use Reward, not Punishment - Don’t nag! Help your child to correct errors and mistakes by showing or demonstrating what he should do rather than focusing on what he did wrong. 2017-07-21 17:12:29
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Swapna Nair
Most kids with ADHD need lots of physical contact. Love them by touching them, hugging them, tickling them, wrestling with them. 2017-07-21 17:12:46
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Swapna Nair
Speak quietly.- Your child may be able to focus more easily on the substance of what you have to say when he doesn’t have to process the tone and the volume, too. 2017-07-21 17:13:02
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Swapna Nair
Learn as much as you can about ADHD. remember there is NOTHING WRONG with his intelligence. His brain will function differently. 2017-07-21 17:14:11
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Swapna Nair
Everyday will be a learning for you. Be open to observing your child, understand his triggers, and modify your parenting. he will have difficulty in socialising so role play with him situations before. Example - if you want to send him to a bday party- role play step by step what he will expect. CULTIVATE PATIENCE.. 2017-07-21 17:16:06
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Hi My girl is around 4 yrs. She is hyperactive, could not concentrate on one thing for long. Still g....

Hi My girl is around 4 yrs. She is hyperactive, could not concentrate on one thing for long. Still good at grasping and friendly. She is premature born after 36 weeks. She would not sit at one place nomatter where she is at school,bank, outdoors or indoors. She says she is fond of doing mischiefs and all notorious things. Please help me on how to calm her down.

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Swapna Nair
Being premature born has nothing to do with hyperactivity. Since she is not diagnosed with ADHD, you have to tackle her hyperactivity differently. She will enjoy challenging tasks and will like to move from one task to another. 2017-07-21 17:18:00
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Swapna Nair
So prepare checklists. A checklist for her daily learning, checklist for other tasks and put it up as a poster in her room or her wardrobe where she can see it. You can make her write out the checklists in a creative and colourful manner to be hung. This will be a constant reminder. Draw columns where she can tick off. reward a star. when she collects a certain number of stars, g ive her a treat. 2017-07-21 17:20:06
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Swapna Nair
Alternate her tasks with puzzles and crosswords. So she can alternate between the task and crossword. The latter will help her retain focus. also her energy will not get drained. Involve her in household chores like setting the table, washing the scooter or car along with you/ folding clothes/ walking the pet/ grooming the pet /setting the table etc. This should be in the checklist. Allow her to play a lot. Dance, music, martial art, artand craft, robotics are some of the ways she can be enrolled in. 2017-07-21 17:22:24
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Hi - My 4 yr girl is quite an active kid. I want to understand the difference between hyperactivity....

Hi - My 4 yr girl is quite an active kid. I want to understand the difference between hyperactivity and ADHD. She gets distracted easily. And she does not listen to anything we say in one go. We have to repeat it multiple times. Her teacher has asked us to work on her concentration span. Can you also give me some tips on how can I increase that? Thanks - Neha

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Swapna Nair
ADHD is: A biological condition that makes it hard for kids to concentrate, pay attention, sit still and curb impulsivity. • Seems forgetful, easily distracted or daydreamy • Appears not to listen and has trouble following directions • Is prone to tantrums and meltdownsdue to frustration or lack of impulse control • Struggles with organization and completing tasks • Has trouble staying on task unless an activity is very enjoyable • Struggles with social skills • Struggles to sit still during quiet activities, such as mealtimes or during independent work time at school • Has trouble waiting his turn and being patient • Is constantly “on the go” or moving; fidgets and needs to pick up and fiddle with everything • Interrupts people, blurts things out inappropriately and may struggle with nonverbal cues • Acts without thinking and may not understand the consequences of his actions • May overreact to sensory input, like the way things sound, smell, taste, look or feel • Plays roughly and takes physical risks 2017-07-21 17:24:01
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Swapna Nair
Trouble following social rules can make it hard to make and keep friends. Frequent negative feedback for acting out or not paying attention can impact self-esteem and motivation, making a child feel he’s “bad” or “no good 2017-07-21 17:24:23
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Swapna Nair
There is nothing wrong with intelligence. The brain will work differently. The executive function is impaired so the child will be 30% slower at accomplishing tasks, in socialising when compared to peers 2017-07-21 17:25:37
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Swapna Nair
Set a time period to study for 1-1.15 hours. Be gentle and firm that she has to follow the routine. Set time box for her. One time box is 30 minutes and 5 minute break. Have 2 such time boxes for her. When she completes studying or writing give her a sticker. When she gets 7 stickers give her a reward. It also looks like she wants your attention. Are you spending enough time with her? Are you listening to her and to what she wants 2017-07-21 17:26:38
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Swapna Nair
To Health Drink concentration: 1. Ask her to circle the letter 'e' from a passage. 2. If she likes to listen to music, play an instrumental piece and ask him to listen the non dominant instrument. 3. Doing a puzzle/ scrabble/ crossword. 4. Colouring/painting 5. Spotting differences in pictures. 6. Scribble with the non dominant hand 2017-07-21 17:27:41
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Swapna Nair
These concentration techniques can be done in the 5 minute breaks 2017-07-21 17:28:00
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Swapna Nair
You can have her stand and learn. Instead of sitting ,let her stand at the table. Standing will help her to move so she will be more comfortable. 2017-07-21 17:28:43
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Swapna Nair
Martial art /art/music/dance/robotics/ swimming are helpful 2017-07-21 17:29:55
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My doughter is 3 and half years old...She is very very active she can not sit quit for more than 10....

My doughter is 3 and half years old...She is very very active she can not sit quit for more than 10 minutes ..Once she started to play with her friends then she forgot everything like to drink water, eat food, going to toilet , she just want to play....She is very aggressive if we tell her to do the things which she don't want to do she just got angry and aggressive. is she adhd issue. pl consult.

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Swapna Nair
ADHD has to be diagnosed by a clinical psychologist. We cannot assume. ADHD is: A biological condition that makes it hard for kids to concentrate, pay attention, sit still and curb impulsivity. • Seems forgetful, easily distracted or daydreamy • Appears not to listen and has trouble following directions • Is prone to tantrums and meltdownsdue to frustration or lack of impulse control • Struggles with organization and completing tasks • Has trouble staying on task unless an activity is very enjoyable • Struggles with social skills • Struggles to sit still during quiet activities, such as mealtimes or during independent work time at school • Has trouble waiting his turn and being patient • Is constantly “on the go” or moving; fidgets and needs to pick up and fiddle with everything • Interrupts people, blurts things out inappropriately and may struggle with nonverbal cues • Acts without thinking and may not understand the consequences of his actions • May overreact to sensory input, like the way things sound, smell, taste, look or feel • Plays roughly and takes physical risks Trouble following social rules can make it hard to make and keep friends. Frequent negative feedback for acting out or not paying attention can impact self-esteem and motivation, making a child feel he’s “bad” or “no good 2017-07-21 17:32:42
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Swapna Nair
Please set a routine for her. It is important to culitvate good habits now on. Allow her to play after she returns for 1 hour. Set a time period to study for 1-1.15 hours. Be gentle and firm that she has to follow the routine. To make her interested in writing, place any of these : a board/ chart/colour paper/ colour pens. Sit beside her and you do some writing task so that she will copy your behaviour. Whens he completes studying or writing give her a sticker. When she gets 7 stickers give her a reward. Be firm about your rules. Talk to her about it. Allow her to make her own time table to study, for play and for Internet/TV. Let it not go beyond an hour. Monitor her usage. Set the penalty for disobeying too .Remove a privilege if she disobeys. When she sees that you mean what you say then she will change .. You have to remind herabout who is in charge at home. Children at this age need authority but tinged with understanding. Do consider enrolling her in swimming/art/music/art/marital art/games coaching to channelise her energy and attention. 2017-07-21 17:34:11
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What is the difference between hyperactive and ADHD child? How do we know that our child is just act....

What is the difference between hyperactive and ADHD child? How do we know that our child is just acting his age and is not ADHD?

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Swapna Nair
Hi Canisha, goodto have you here. There is a lot of confusion aboutt he question yo uask. And unfortunately teachers at school are ready to label kids who are every active.. One should understandthat we have moved from independent houses with courtyards to aprtments. There are very few parks and due to safety and pollution and nuclear families with working moms, children hardly get to play outdoors. they haven o channel to burn their energy hence they are restless in the classroom because that is where they spend most of their day. 2017-07-21 17:37:44
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Swapna Nair
ADHD is A biological condition that makes it hard for kids to concentrate, pay attention, sit still and curb impulsivity. • Seems forgetful, easily distracted or daydreamy • Appears not to listen and has trouble following directions • Is prone to tantrums and meltdownsdue to frustration or lack of impulse control • Struggles with organization and completing tasks • Has trouble staying on task unless an activity is very enjoyable • Struggles with social skills • Struggles to sit still during quiet activities, such as mealtimes or during independent work time at school • Has trouble waiting his turn and being patient • Is constantly “on the go” or moving; fidgets and needs to pick up and fiddle with everything • Interrupts people, blurts things out inappropriately and may struggle with nonverbal cues • Acts without thinking and may not understand the consequences of his actions • May overreact to sensory input, like the way things sound, smell, taste, look or feel • Plays roughly and takes physical risks Trouble following social rules can make it hard to make and keep friends. Frequent negative feedback for acting out or not paying attention can impact self-esteem and motivation, making a child feel he’s “bad” or “no good 2017-07-21 17:38:02
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Swapna Nair
ADHD has to be diagnosed through standarised tests by a clinical psychologist. Only they can assess and diagnose. Then the child has to be referred to the child specialist who may prescribe medication depending on the diagnosis 2017-07-21 17:38:55
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Ok thank you. I was getting confused 2017-07-21 17:39:36
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whether my son is just hyperactive or is ADHD. But thankfully nothing applies to him 2017-07-21 17:40:07
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Swapna Nair
There isn othing worng with the intelligence .ADHD is hereditary. It is just that the brain works differently and will be 30 % slower to manage socialising, managing emotions and getting task done 2017-07-21 17:40:35
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Ok! Thank you Swapna. 2017-07-21 17:41:04
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Swapna Nair
Oh no, your son never seemed to have the signs too . I have keenly read about him when you have written 2017-07-21 17:41:20
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Thank you so much. Actually one of the elderly relative commented on him being ADHD and hence I got confused. Thank you for clearing your doubts. 2017-07-21 17:42:23
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Swapna Nair
Welcome. 2017-07-21 17:42:39
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for d hyper active child,to bring d concentration in studies,some people suggested me to join in a....

for d hyper active child,to bring d concentration in studies,some people suggested me to join in any activity like badminton .is it really helpful

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Swapna Nair
Yes any such activity will be helpful. 2017-07-21 17:43:11
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Swapna Nair
You could aslo try these: To Health Drink concentration: 1. Ask him to circle the letter 'e' from a passage. 2. If he likes to listen to music, play an instrumental piece and ask him to listen the non dominant instrument. 3. Doing a puzzle/ scrabble/ crossword. 4. Colouring/painting 5. Spotting differences in pictures. 6. Scribble using the non dominant hand 2017-07-21 17:43:45
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Swapna Nair
Enrolling in music/dance/martial art/sports/robotics/art and craft will also help 2017-07-21 17:44:15
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Swapna Nair
Try a standing desk- where he stands and reads than sitting. Allot time slotso f 25 min study and 5 min breaks. In the breaks he can do any of the above concetration technique 2017-07-21 17:44:55
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Swapna Nair
Also buy him a stress ball so that he can use it in the five min break. Allow him to walk about (in his room) and learn. 2017-07-21 17:45:30
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Also I have a nephew who is restless but he is just 3 years. Can he be ADHD

Also I have a nephew who is restless but he is just 3 years. Can he be ADHD

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Swapna Nair
Just check with the symptoms I gave. ADHD can be detected this early too. But have him evaluated by a clinical psychologist only. Often we may think the child is hyperactive, fidgety but as he grows these may just fade away. Because it may be just hyperactivity and not ADHD.Hence get him assessed. But you can delay the medication. many doctors prescribe. That can be delayed, especially if he is on the borderline,unless it is really necessary 2017-07-21 17:48:21
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Swapna Nair
The medication will have side effects and that also ahs to be clarified with the doctor. 2017-07-21 17:49:16

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