Parenting Child Psychology and Behaviour

Why Do Teenage Siblings Fight With Each Other?

Tasneem Sariya
11 to 16 years

Created by Tasneem Sariya
Updated on Aug 29, 2021

Why Do Teenage Siblings Fight With Each Other
Reviewed by Expert panel

Sibling fights are not a rarity. Anyone who is a parent to more than one teen child or has siblings of their own, know for certain that fights among siblings is a perfectly natural process of growing up. The fights could be as regular as shouting and screaming or more dramatic when punches are landed on each other.

Common Reasons Why Teenage Siblings Fight?

Some reasons why teenage sibling fights take place:

  1. Temperament–

    Every child has a different emotional and temperamental character. Some children are more aggressive, egoistic or forth going. Others may be shy, quiet and can easily let go. Sibling fights are thus caused when the children react according to their temperaments. The intensity and frequency of the fight also depends on the child’s mood and ability to adapt
  2. Lack of equality–

    Parents love all their children equally, however, the children themselves never believe this thumb rule. Older children cannot come to terms with the leniency that parents provide for their younger siblings. Similarly, younger children do not understand why they are not given as much freedom as their older siblings. Hence, children often misunderstand their parent’s reaction and affection towards their siblings, which leads to traits of jealousy and anger
  3. Sharing–

    Sharing their physical belongings, such as, toys, clothes, books or even a room, are often the biggest reason for fights between siblings. And of course, God help if something is broken or lost in the process!
  4. Need for attention–

    Another reason for sibling fights, is when one child feels neglected due to the other. Very often older kids find their mother spending more time with the younger child and often getting irritated or showing frustration towards the older child for not acting maturely. The younger sibling on the other hand, may feel always having to follow in the footsteps of the older child, hence creating a rift and need for more individual attention. This disparity in attention is also seen for ex., when a child is sick, or it is his birthday or he is appreciated for his particular efforts and actions
  5. Age gap–

    Very often siblings with lesser age gap end up fighting more with each other, since their needs and wants are the same. Siblings with a larger age gap often have the advantage of the older child being more affectionate and mature towards the younger child

How To Stop Teenage Siblings Fighting?

Some tips to stop sibling fighting are:

  1. Do not get involved–

    As parents try your best to stay out of the battle field. Let the children sort out the matter themselves
  2. Lay the rules–

    Make yourself very clear on what kind of language and behavior is acceptable. This will ensure that your children understand that they will be reprimanded and be responsible for the consequences of their fights
  3. Divide common things–

    If the fights are related to sharing stuff, allocate different times for each child to use them
  4. Give attention–

    Understand that each child is different and provide each with the attention and warmth that they need and desire

Sibling rivalry can be a nightmare of sorts where parents are always looking for ways to stop sibling fighting, however, it is one of the best ways to develop in your children the need to share, adapt and live as a family. Also, it is true that the enmity between the siblings is a temporary fickle situation that passes off very often quickly. In fact, sibling fights are regular hiccups in an otherwise close and confidant relation that the siblings carry with them for life.

Did you like the blog? Did you find it useful? Please share your thoughts, ideas and feedbacks with us in the comments section below; we’d love to hear from you.

This content has been checked & validated by Doctors and Experts of the parentune Expert panel. Our panel consists of Neonatologist, Gynecologist, Peadiatrician, Nutritionist, Child Counselor, Education & Learning Expert, Physiotherapist, Learning disability Expert and Developmental Pead.

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| Apr 02, 2018

sibling rivalry is inevitable amongst siblings. no matter how impartial parents are towards both kids ,they would find a reason to fight.. definitely a useful blog with effective tips to deal with it.

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| Apr 07, 2018

. 9eà0. ò38983

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| Apr 07, 2018


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| Apr 21, 2019


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| Aug 20, 2020

Very much informative ..i like this blog

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