Parenting Child Psychology and Behaviour

Why Your Teenager Needs Space?

Urvashi Shah
11 to 16 years

Created by Urvashi Shah
Updated on May 28, 2018

Why Your Teenager Needs Space

If you have a teen in your house, you must have come across a lot of times when he/she slammed the door to you, just in order to seek some privacy. As a parent you are bothered about this and perhaps even thinking a lot about what happens behind the closed door, but hey, we have all been there! Teenage is such a time of life, which sets an individual in to confusion, inclusive of everything going around in one’s life. This is the age where the body starts to mature, sexuality starts setting in, which urges the teens to have some privacy of their own. You must understand that your child’s need for privacy roots from his/her developing in to a teenager. While it might be hard to step back, giving your teen space within healthy parameters will promote a healthy parent-child relationship in the long run. If you wish for this, then get ready to cut some slack to your child and accept his/her period of development.

Let Us Look Up On Some Reasons As To Why Teenagers Need Space

  1. Privacy and trust:

    Teenage privacy issues stems from trust issues. Since teenagers feel they are growing in to adults, they want to feel that their parents trust on them to be able to do more and more things. They wish to be matured and capable of handling independence. At times teens tend to have private conversations with their friends or siblings, which parents must respect. A girl teen may find it comfortable to confide things to her mother while a boy teen might be comfortable confiding things to his dad rather than mother. This happens especially in the case if romantic relationships or physiological changes are concerned
  2. Other reasons:

    Apart from their strive to be independent, teens also confront a lot of physical changes. A daughter who always felt comfortable changing clothes in front of her mother may no longer want to disrobe in front of her. She may also lock her bedroom door or the bathroom door to ensure that her wish for privacy is respected

Let Us Now Look Up On The Importance Of Teenage Privacy

As parents you are sure concern about your growing child as he/she is constantly demanding privacy from you. But instead of being worried, why not you look at the bright side of the picture? Let me give you a few reasons stating the importance of teenage space.

  1. Independence:

    You wish your teen to remain your baby forever, but also need to accept the fact that he/she is growing up to be a matured individual. By giving your child some space, be it in his/her bedroom or while making certain decisions, you are instilling a sense of trust in them. As you help foster a sense of independence and trust in your child, he/she will make an important transition in to adulthood. By hovering around your child during decision making, you are likely to promote dependency on you. Let your teen have some space and the autonomy of making decisions
  2. Trust:

    Your inquisitive mind and alerted senses might want you to desperately spy through the closed doors. But this gives a clear message to your teen that you do not trust him/her. Giving a considerable amount of space to your teen will enable him/her to know that you trust their judgment. Trust is a two-way thing where your teen must earn your trust before you give it freely, and it can be taken away when he/she takes advantage of his/her new-found freedom inappropriately

Teenagers and privacy go hand-in-hand but this is not always linked to poor behaviour. Your teen experiences a natural pull away from you, which helps him/her prep up for adulthood. As a parent, the amount of space and privacy you give to your child should be directly proportional to his/her past decisions and your level of trust. Giving space to your teen doesn’t mean you ignore him/her, it rather highlights the fact that you respect his/her privacy. Amidst all this, you need to maintain an open communication system, which will make your child feel comfortable and open up to you more.

When we give our teens their needed privacy, they become more independent and aware, which helps in building up their self confidence. Balance between knowing what your teen is doing, trusting your teen to have some private matters and knowing when to step in is a fine line that parents walk every day.

When To Invade Your Teen’s Privacy

When you give you teen some privacy, you naturally tend to remain unaware of a lot of things going on in their lives. If your child might have had a fight with a friend, he/she might refrain from telling you so, which is why you shouldn’t step in such matters, unless it raises an alarm. Your child is growing up and you obviously want him/her to become matured and responsible, which is why certain matters should be left alone for your child to deal with. You can draw a line on privacy if your child is showing signs of depression or hurting someone else.

If you find your child sleeping all the time, inclined towards substance abuse, has lost interest in his/her favourite activities or is withdrawing, it is time to step in and take matters in to your own hands. You need to openly communicate with your child about matters that has been troubling him/her, in order to know the exact status.

Respecting a teen’s privacy is an important move if you want your child to believe you trust him/her. But, if your child is showing major signs of acting out, it is essential that you invade his/her privacy and seek help.

Did you like the blog? Did you find it useful? Do share your thoughts with us in the comments section below; we’d love to hear from you.

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| May 14, 2018

I'm glad the blog is helping you all connect with your personal life situations regarding your wonderful teens :)

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| May 09, 2018

yes it is important to respect their privacy. but it's a mutual thing, the more trust u gain, the more freedom u get..

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| May 04, 2018

Thanks mam this blog help me much as i m a mother of a teen girl nd younger daughter will step in teen age early

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| May 04, 2018

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