Back Talk in Children

Back talking is a problem faced by every parent at some point. I think one of the most important thing to do is determine the trigger factor. Children can back talk if they are hungry, tired or feel they are not listened to. I have noticed that staying calm is very important rather than getting into an argument. It is very important to make your child feel that you are listening to them. Also one of the best things to do is live by example. How we behave and interact with the other members in the family will also reflect on our children.

Hi Shree. I agree with Anurima here, staying calm and composed here holds the key. When I look back now, I have backtalked as well when I was a child, however I now realise, there were times when my dad used to get all the more angry, which did not make me stop either. But offlate, when I see kids backtalking, the parents have been tackling the same with reasoning. It is important to understand the reason behind such back talking. Mostly its due to some kind of an influence - tv, peers, aping elders etc. I think, reasoning it out with your child should help. Children today become adults, even before they realise. They feel back talking is in someway - having arrived in life.

I also needed to talk on this subject and I agree with Arunima and Praveen. I would like to add something more, I have seen children talk back to a parent only in the presence of the other parent, which means the child has less fear of being reprimanded. This may mean that the child hears the parents talk and repeats the behavior. The solution may be to be respectful and loving to each other in the presence of the child and never raise ones voice or fight when the child is present.

Most of the things that children do come from parents. Unknowingly, we backtalk with our children when there is an arguement between us and that's how they learn that this is the best way to shut up the mouth of the other person. I believe if there is any arguement between child and parent/s then we should act mature and should not get engrossed in the arguement and instead be quite and should start discussion from a different tangent that is more comprehendable to the child. I have implemented this and I have seen positive change.

thankyou Ann for your valuable input