How do i curb my son's demands

Hi Akshaya, what you are facing can be quite hard. I have the same issue with my son, but since he is the younger child and i am a wiser parent now, i realize that his demands, however loud and weepy, are temporary. The thing that works for me is to 1. take a deep breath and not give in to the temptation of saying 'yes, you can have it' and 2. Think about whether his ask is reasonable. If it is, i get him what he likes, but if it isn't, i let him know that what he is asking for is unreasonable and i cannot agree. Normally, he starts crying even as i start the explanation of why i am not agreeing to his demands, so i let him cry a little and when he is a little quieter, i explain it to him again. He used to continue crying earlier and then i would ask him to calm down and then come to me, because i love him. Nowadays, he stops crying and listens, and since he is old enough to understand some logic, if he finds my argument logical, he stops immediately and gets distracted by something else. if he doesn't like the logic, he argues. From my point of view, an argument is absolutely fine, because it gives us both a chance to understand each other better, and i know that if i speak quietly, he will too. Hope this helps.

hey Akshara, I am raising a 12 year old and have faced this on some occasions. I have also seen children in extended family get unreasonably demanding. As Haritha said, if it is an unfair demand, I would try my best not to give in even though it means putting up with tantrums in a public place. It may happen few times but children do come around when they figure mum wont budge. :)

Dear Akshaya, this is a problem faced by most parents. Haritha and Neetu have made some great suggestions. What I do to avoid such circumstances especially in a public place is to try and make my daughter understand that she cannot ask for anything and everything when at the store. I try and reason with her and make sure she understands and all this is done at home, before leaving. If she is a good girl, she occasionally gets a small toy or treat but its only occasional. You could try this approach with your child and it could take a while, but as the other mothers have said that once your child knows that you wont change your mind, he will automatically adjust :) But the bottom line is to handle the situation calmly. Hope this helps.

Hey Thanks Neetu, Haritha & Anurima. I have tried the suggestion given by anurima i. e, educating him before leaving home that he can't ask for anything n everything but as soon as v go to the shop the same old thing starts. But definitely try doing it again n again so that he gets to know that i'll not yield to all his demands. Lets C. And as neetu n Haritha told he starts yelling in the public place that at times humiliates but somehow i'm just seeing to it that incase if I say a no its a no always.. I hope he'll hv a saturation someday. Just waiting for that day.

Hey Thanks Neetu, Haritha & Anurima. I have tried the suggestion given by anurima i. e, educating him before leaving home that he can't ask for anything n everything but as soon as v go to the shop the same old thing starts. But definitely try doing it again n again so that he gets to know that i'll not yield to all his demands. Lets C. And as neetu n Haritha told he starts yelling in the public place that at times humiliates but somehow i'm just seeing to it that incase if I say a no its a no always.. I hope he'll hv a saturation someday. Just waiting for that day.

Please pour in any new suggestions. Thanks

Yes Akshaya, he will try to break you by yelling and throwing tantrums as this would have been in his favour in the past. But like all the other moms have said, you must not give in to his demands thinking about other people. Most people understand that it is normal for children to behave like this and really do not bother much. Hang in there, he will grow out of it :)

Dear Akshaya! U cud put the message across to ur child before leaving home itself that child cannot demand anything n everything as u r going there with a purpose. N if u contunue wasting money on every toy etc u will be running out of money n won't b able to save money for education, food n health. U cud ask him to weigh what is important spending money on important things or stickers, toys etc. u cud share with yr child the plight of a street child who does not even get to have a square meal. Show him the situation of construction laborers children who live in such conditions n u wud prefer giving money to them rather than spending money on such not so important items. Whenever I am out with my kid I make it a point to show them children begging on streets and children of laborers. When ever she demands anything I tell her the list of things we have to buy n ask her to weigh what is more important. Hope this works with ur child too.

hey friends I am glad to tell that the inputs by you'll are working. he has learnt now that i'll not bend for his needs n somewhat have controlled on his demands. Thanks all. Shikha actually the one which u told me is also a very good one and I hv just given him a hint abt it.. will try telling him in an elaborate way.. Thank u ladies :)