kid not reacting wen sum1 hits him
Created by Updated on Jul 28, 2013
hello parents. My son is 2. 1 years old n is going school since last month. After school all children r used to play near building. My problem is a boy who is a year elder then my son and m not able 2 understand what problem he is Having wit my son. Whenever he gets chance he pushes and punches my son. The mistake i made is while making my son Gud any i made him soo nice that he doesnt react 2 that boy. My son wil cry 2 me if he got hurt but dont knw how 2 defend. How do i teach him defending. If i wil teach that wen sum 1 hits u hit back he Mite do it 2 elders also so how do i teach him defending?
| Jul 29, 2013
Hi Reema! I can understand ur concern. I appreciate u for instilling such values in ur child. N I also agree with u that u wud like ur child to be able to defend himself. But reacting the way the other child is behaving by hitting back wud make the matter worse. Probably it cud make u enter into a tiff with his parents, it cud lead to a fight between two kids in which either or both are hurt badly, or as u r suspecting he cud learn hitting n adopt the same means on others too. So the best way wud be to inform his parents by asking ur child to report the matter to them, talking to that child urself to convey the message he is being watched, if still this does not work asking ur child to stop playing n talking to him. Telling ur child to say 'NO ' to him without being scared is another way of telling that he is not liking watever is going on.
| Jul 29, 2013
hi reema.. i cn totally understand ur problem coz evn my daughter who is nw 2. 3 ws in the same situation... n evn i ws concerned like u. i agree wit shikha tht eithr u talk to the childs parents or stop ur child frm playin the boy for a few days.. at the same time u cn teach ur child to stop bein pushed or hit by sayin a no ...jst as shikha hs told. also tell ur child to inform u immediately wenever he is bein hit.. u cn also keep counsellin ur child not to b scared of anyone... my daughter hs nw learnt to defend herself by sayin a loud n firm no... ur son will soon learn it too..
| Jul 29, 2013
Dear Reema , my son had to undergo the same situation and my own friends son used to push him, thrash him and he used to bear silently and used to feel scared of him. Though my friend herself didn't quite like her son's behaviour but was not helping much. I and my husband talked to our son about the whole thing and how the other child's behaviour was not right and at the same time we worked on his fear and assertiveness. We made him understand through role-play that even he is capable of hitting but he doesn't choose to hit and we rewarded him for his strength of keeping his calm.... at the same time I used to watch him constantly to intervene at the right time. Gradually he became better at dealing with such situations.
| Jul 30, 2013
It is advisable to call ur son's friends home and talk to them over this issue. If this warning does not work u cud directly speak to his parents. Saying NO to him by ur child is the best way to stop him from doing so. He should also learn to defend himself not by hitting but by taking a stand that this behavior is unacceptable no matter what and will not be tolerated.