Created by Vanitha Updated on Jun 25, 2017
my son he is going to be 5 yrs. very sensitive, he cannot see others doing better than him .he is scared of failure, he doesn't want to do things what he don't know. plz tell me sme suggestions regarding this issue
| Jun 26, 2017
hi Vanitha! consider this, a child comes home from school after giving an exam, a mother's first question would be "how was your exam "and second would be "and how did your friends write their papers?" so it is us parents who r inculcating this competitive spirit in them and making them be a part of the mad race. this is precisely the reason why even when we grow up we keep comparing ourselves with our relatives/ friends/ neighbors / cousins . if they have something more than us, this makes us unhappy. their happiness give us more pain and vice versa too stands true. It's time Vanitha we start telling our children to compete with themselves . we should tell them their today's performance should be better than yesterday's. if they want to be really happy in life, then school marks is definitely not the criteria and they would forget their grades by next year or so . schooling teaches them basics about life . so to get competition out of life , we parents have to first, reinforce the same and stop asking them " how much did his classmates/ friends get?". secondly fear of failure is again something we keep reminding our children time and again" if u don't do this, u will fail". so this line "U WILL FAIL" become part of their inner voice . they stop trying and even if they attempt to do something , .the fear of failure haunts them. Vanitha it's advisable to be the change u want to see in your child. motivate him and praise him for his efforts. winning and losing should not matter much as long as he is happily participating. hope this helps!