Child Psychology and Behaviour

Twin-1 biting and thinking other has always better

3 to 7 years

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Updated on Sep 09, 2015

I have twin daughter. Daughter-2 is ok. Daughter-1 everytime she feels other have better than me and kind of bossy. Example - if she holds a soft toy and other having small toy. She throws hers and wants to grab her and if other doesn't allow she tries to bite. Bossy means if she wants something, she wont leave you till the thing is done. Every time I have to make her understand in a soft voice. And in school they r telling her mind is full of jealous. She is just 3yr .

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| Sep 09, 2015

Hi Snigdha! Trust me when i say sibling rivalry is one issue most of the parents with two kids face. Between twins the chances increase as since they are twins they are expected to behave alike and if they don't comparison between them is natural from family members, teachers,relatives etc. It is advisable to 1. Understand what goes on in the mind of the child when she reacts in such a manner. 2. Avoid comparisons between siblings. 3. Make her understand politely, snatching and biting are not good habits. 4. She is going through a phase where she feels her sister is getting more attention and love. Shouting or hitting will make her further rebellious and reinforce her worst fears. This would widen the gap between siblings. Her resentment might come out in the form of physically targeting the sibling and even misbehaving in school. 5. For few days show more physical love to her by hugging her often, serving her first, giving her a chance to express self and then to the other one . Please ensure u don't let them know or dont spell out that u r purposely giving daughter 1 first chance as other one might feel left out. Don't worry this is something children outgrow if dealt with tactfully. I'm sure u r already doing yr best to help her come out of this low phase where she feels left out and thereby reacts. Hitting others might prove she is physically strong but from within (emotionally) she is weak and needs yr support. Hope this helps!

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