Has your child high jacked the iPad? - The right way to introduce an I-pad to a Child

There was a time when life in a regular home had limited gadget influence, it was either a single Telephone line or a Television… yes those were simpler times.
Cut to current times, nowadays our children are being introduced to new gadgets on a regular basis. While these new age gadgets are great in terms of exposure and cutting edge edutainment they come along with repercussions of their own.

Last week I was visiting a friend and I noticed that her 6 year old was playing a game on the I-pad; the child was in no mood to play with my daughter while at the same time he did not want to share his prize possession with the other child in the room. I was still wondering as to how to engage my daughter when my very flustered friend came up with the explanation that her son was very possessive about the I-pad and that is why he was unwilling to share it with my daughter.

Which led to my next inquiry as to how at the age of 6, a child was given a personal I-pad? To this came the harried answer that though the I-pad was bought for the whole family, but over time the child had just managed to throw enough tantrums to lay sole claims on the gadget and now just to avoid getting into a confrontation with him, the parents had given up and bought another one for the rest of the Family.

While I was left surprised at the way things had turned out in my friend house, it also inspired me to write this blog and compile a list of simple things parents could do to make sure a child understands the boundaries that come along with such superfluities of life.

What is the right age to introduce a child to an I-pad?

It is a universally known fact that children need to learn form real world experiences, interactions and time spent in front of the screen may mean that the child is not exploring the world and utilizing and developing all the senses. A toddler may like to push buttons and watch videos but that does not mean that s/he is ready for activity on an I-pad. Experts recommend that many children already in a preschool (or by age 3) are active media users and could benefit from electronic media with educational content. In effect, minimal I-pad interaction with educational content may be started at the age of 3.

What are some of the simple things parents could do while introducing the I-pad?

When introducing a Gadget to the other members of the house (and by other members I mean the children in the house) the fundamental ground rules need to be established. This is critical because this may be the sole factor that will make sure that the child understands that the I-Pad is for the whole family and not just one person and this would go a long way in ensuring appropriate usage of the I-pad.

What are some of the basic ground rules that need to be set in the house?

In an ideal scenario most Parents believe that their child would use it to develop herself, and would be disciplined about it but sometimes reality is a very different picture. Setting the ground rules early on may help the parents avoid an unpleasant situation later in the day.
The following few points may help the parents set the rules:

1. Planned Time: Ensure that the child understands the discipline around the access of the I-pad. Making dinnertime and homework time completely off limits for an I-Pad activity. Another non-appropriate time for an I-Pad activity may be just before the bed, (parent could read a story from the I- Pad) as a violent/ aggressive game just before the bed may wind up the child more rather than soothing the child and slowly drifting to a peaceful sleep.
2. Designating the Usage Place: A central place like a living room or drawing room can be the designated place for an I- pad usage. Once a set place in the house is established the parent can expect the following two things to not happen:
a) The children may not walk all around the house with the I-pad and the parents will not have to worry about the physical damage that the I- pad may go through if it falls.
b) A parent will always be clued in to when the child is using the I-pad. Sometimes when a child is allowed to use the I-pad anywhere in the house, the parents have no idea of the total time that the child has spent navigating on the I-pad.

3. Positive Role modeling: We can only lead by example, if a parent is constantly on the I-pad for one reason or other then it is only fair that the child may want to do the same thing. If some house rules have been set then it is imperative that the parent adheres to the rules first and then starts to expect the same from the child.
4. Realizing your own contribution to the Problem: This probably may be the toughest to deal with for a Parent. Once a parent has introduced the child to the fantastic world of fun and entertainment, it will definitely have some kind of an impact on the child and in some cases it may bring about some resistance on the planned time usage of the I-pad. It is in these moments a parent needs to be calm and have clarity to see the bigger picture; which is to let the child gain the maximum from such a wonderful device yet not letting it takeover the family time.
5. Making the child understand the Financial Implications: It is very important that a child understands that an I-pad is a costly device and deserves cautious handling. Most of the times, the parents do not discuss the same with the child and then there is a lot of love lost when the child mishandles the gadget creating unnecessary rift between the parent –child bond.
6. Leveraging the I-pad: Making the child understand that the I-pad is a privilege and it deserves the appropriate respect is very important. The child needs to know that this privilege can be revoked in case of inappropriate behavior from the child and will only be reinstated if the parent sees positive changes in behavior of the child.
7. Family Time: The I-pad could be used for bonding activities in the beginning like playing a game of “Scrabble” or the great logo guessing game called “Logo Quiz”, this will set a clear precedence of the purpose of this gadget.
8. Control on the content: In most cases it helps if the final consent on the content and the games that may be downloaded lies with the parent. This defines the ownership hierarchy of the I-pad with the child and the parents may not find themselves in a situation where an age inappropriate content is available to the child.
9. Physical Harm: Though in rare cases a child may suffer from a stiff neck or dry eyes, with an overuse of the I-pad but on the whole unsupervised screen time is also associated with Obesity and deficits in social and intellectual growth. For this reason it is important that the parent makes the child aware of the negative implications that the I-pad could have on the body and mind.
10. Excessive Possessiveness: If the parent notices changes in the child’s personality that may be an outcome of the excessive use of the I-pad like, the child is constantly talking about the I-pad or throwing a tantrum if someone else is using it, then it is definitely time to reinforce the ground rules and reinstate the balance.

Personally, these rules have worked in our house and I stand by each and every one of them but this is for sure that the key is to set consistent limits and let your child appreciate and utilize the I-pad without getting in the way of healthy brain and body development.

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