Aap positive parent kaise ban sakte hain?

Hi Moms!! I know ki hum sab bahut busy rehte hain. Hamaare bachhe hamein busy rakhte hain. Phir bhi I am sure ki aap sab apne liye kuchh time zaroor nikalte honge. Zaroori bhi hai! Main aaj aapko bataana chahungi ki positive parenting kyon zaroori hai.

Main aap logon ko blame nahi karungi kyonki main khud bhi aisi hi thi ek time pe. Baaki sab logon ki tarah main bhi wahi tareekon se apni daughter ko badaa kar rah ithi. Sabki advice sunti thi aur follow karne  ki  koshish karti thi. Apni daughter ko main ek obedient child banaana chahti thi. Ab bachhe toh apni marzi ke maalik hote hain, ye sabko pataa hai. Toh wo bhi apni marzi karti thi, aur jab main use manaa karti thi toh wo roti thi. Uske rone se mujhe aur gussa aa jaata tha aur main usse bahut daant deti thi. Fir woh aur roti thi. Aise hi chal rahaa tha sab. 

Usko daantne ke baad mujhe bahut guilty feel hota tha, specially jab wo ro-ro ke so jaatithi, tab main uske paas baithke roti thi. Mera mind bahut pareshan rehne lag gaya ki kya aisi hoti hai parenting?? Kya mujhe apne bachhe ko achha insaan banaane ke liye uske saath aise behave karna padega?

Tab andar se mere dil ki awaaz aai ki nahi, ye sahi raasta nahi hai. Bahut research kia, bahut dhoonda ki kya karoon jis se mere aur meri daughter ke beech mein ye ladaai khatam hojaaye. Hamaara relation kharaab ho rahaa tha (although bahut saare parents is baat ko bahut late realise kar paate hain). Meri journey ki shuruaat hui ek video se,  jis mein ye bataaya gaya tha ki ek child ki personality kaise banti hai since birth. Aur usmein ek bahut important baat bataayi gaye thi ki agar child ke initial years mein usei achha treatment na diya jaaye toh uska asar uski poori life rehta hai. Ye mere liye bahut badi baat thi. Kahaan toh main soch rahi thi ki main apni daughter ko har cheez best doongi, aur kahaan main uski shuruaat hi galat tareekon se kar rahi thi.

Uske baad maine Facebook pe parenting pages dhoondne shuru kiye. Aur mujhe Rebecca Eanes mili. Rebecca ki wajah se mujhe positive parenting ka sahi matlab samajh aaya ki hamein bachhon ko raise karne ke liye pyaar se samjhaane ki zarurat hai. Us pyaar se aapas ka trust bantaa hai. Aur bachhe hamaare close aa jaate hain. Pyaar se samjhaayeinge toh zaruri nahi ki hamesha bachhe hamaari baat maan hi jaayein. Par dheere dheere karke wo hamaari baat samajheinge aur khud sochna shuru kareinge. Maine Rebecca ki book 'Newbie's guide to positive parenting second edition' buy ki. Aur padi. Pehli baar padi toh achhi toh lagi par apply kuchh bhi nahi kar paai. Old habits die hard. Fir maine dobara padi. Aur aaj bhi padti hun. Chahe ek chapter hi padoon. Us book ne mera bachhon ko dekhne ka nazaria hi badal dia. Dheere dheere Rebecca ki book ki baatein main apply karne lag gai. Aur maine dekha ki ki meri daughter aur main ab pehle se kahin zyada calm thei. Hum ek doosre ko samajhne lag gaye thei. Aaj hum dono ek doosre ke best friends hain. Galti karte hain, ek doosre ko naraaz bhi karte hain. Fir sorry bol dete hain. Aur aage bad jaate hain.

Hum dono ye baat samajhte hain ki galti ho jaati hai kisi se bhi, mumma se bhi aur beti se bhi. Aap sab se request hai ki please apne bachhon ke liye time nikaaliye aur apne parenting ke tareekon ko change kariye dheere dheere. Meri journey mein bhi bahot setbacks aaye hain aur abhi tak bhi aate rehte hain, par mera decision pakka hai ki mujhe positive parent hi banna hai. Let's make a better world for our next generation.