Parenting

Confessions of a second-time mother

Swetha Kannan
3 to 7 years

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Confessions of a second time mother

A first-time mom changed when she became the second-time mom! Less tolerant, less experimental and less accepting, the second time around, this mother shares her guilt in a beautifully written blog.


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Sarika Bang

| Mar 22, 2017

Mine is the reverse case than u... for first time i was impatient when my son was doing some naughty things but now second time mother i observed that i became very calm & patient... now i started enjoying things they do..

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Aparna Hariharan

| Jan 04, 2017

Oh how much I can relate with you with respect to age factor. I have too become impatient and fussy mom after birth of my second child. I must confess that all my frustration goes on the elder son 4. 5 years as I feel I have no control on the little one being 1 year old. your post has really awakened me and I would find ways to amend my temper and enjoy the divinity of motherhood. Thanks for the post.

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Adrija Bhaduri

| Dec 03, 2016

I wud like to share my thought with you. U first nid to understand that you have 2 children 2 love but dey have only one set of parents to give and take love from .... so njy what d second one does as you now already know many things change with time

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Sumishadeepak

| Jul 25, 2016

my case is just reverse of yours..... for my first chilI was some what strict but when my second child came she made me patient mother..... real fact is I became used to it..... ppp

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anubha bhatt

| Jul 20, 2016

yes it's true. I totally agree with this.

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Roopal Jain

| Apr 14, 2016

Ya true... I also need to confess that for the second child I m not the same.. I am being different.... I don't know why... But I guess it is because I have to do again all the same things...

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Sonia Sachdeva

| Mar 31, 2016

Ya very true what love n fun we had with the elder one we never had that much energy for the younger one. So best thing what I am doing is to let my younger one to do what she wants I hardly interfere with her activities. I am letting her to scribble all over the walls at least she is busy doing something... so I have become more tolerant now

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deepti chhikara

| Feb 13, 2016

Hi swetha my case is just reverse of yours. I being mother of 3 children now .I had become more tolerant & patient. My eldest daughter use to get scolded frequently by me but after her I just knew that every child behaves like this & secondly when they wud grow up I would miss all there pranks &naughtiness. So now I don't loose my temper easily also I keep in mind that we have also done all these things .so don't panic sit back and just chill later u wud miss all these moments.

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archana j

| Jan 15, 2016

oh i must say in my case i m all reverse.. for first daughter i was very impatient and in try to make her perfect dint allowed anything and really missed all those lovely moments of her childhood. but i very late realiesed that i did injustice to her... and during my second daughter i m so patient and calm and dont want to repeat my mistake. but my guilt is still very high.

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Pratiksha Porwal

| Jan 14, 2016

Remember your walls can be painted not once, not twice but as many times as you want it. This child is second just in number but is as special as the elder one. So his childhood won't come back too! As a mother no one understands this better than you. So next time and every time,don't stop him... stop yourselves! Enjoy the second motherhood... You can do it!

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Sruthi Patiballa

| Jan 13, 2016

Dear suchita, My advice to you is to plan for a second one, age is just one of the factor. I have seen my sister and aunt who felt only one child is enuf at the starting but they faced many difficulties to raise a single child. Difficulties are like the child feels lonely, insecure while the child is growing up. They need a sister or brother who they can trust to share anything and everything with them. Coming to your problem you said you can't handle all the things m. You can take your mother or inlaws help or you can even hire a full time maid to look after your 1st kid and also help you in your house hold work. As you said your daughter too is asking for a sibling, she will definitely help you in taking care of the baby too. Wish you good luck.

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Vasudha Rao

| Jan 12, 2016

Its okie to allow d kids to scribble in wall when we r in own house but d same cannot be allowed if we were in rented house. As I experienced it when we were in rented house. When ever my daughter takes pencil or pen I will run behind her to see what she does. But thank god she didn't scribbled much... Our owner strictly told us don't allow d kid to scribble on d wall.

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Suchita Agrawal Vashishth

| Jan 12, 2016

I became mother first tym At the age of 30 now I want second baby for my Daughter but m not fit enough to do All steps from pregnancy to delivery Thn growing them up.. Now M 33 and I saw many tyms Tht my daughter needs sibling to Play with.. Please discuss or suggest me what should I do.. I don't have any support during pregnancy and after Tht too.. I m scared about it but my inner soul tell me for one more baby ..

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Akshada Hawaldar

| Jan 08, 2016

So true.. going through the same feeling

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prachi singh

| Jan 08, 2016

Too tuchuyu

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ruchi gupta

| Jan 07, 2016

True said. Facing same situation. Don't know how to handle my intolerance.

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Hari Tholeti

| Jan 07, 2016

While we get boggled to deal such situations, it would be always helpful if we recollect the stories how were we brought up and how our parents handled us. I feel this would really help in growing tolerance levels in us :)

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Atul Tripathi

| Jan 07, 2016

Facing similar situation here,don't know how to control over such situations and keep calm.

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jasmine

| Jan 07, 2016

So true... thats all i can say..

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Anushila Biswas

| Jan 07, 2016

Same to same situation and outcome in my case..... the only difference is my elder one is a girl and she was not so much agile and monsterous. But with my boy who is 1. 5, I am facing the same difficulties at 33. I completely agree with you that age plays a big role in parenting.... I'm too much less tolerant and considerate now so more guilty at the end. Best of luck to all second time mommies and wish you all more tolerance and patience.

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Kavitha Bharathi

| Jan 07, 2016

I am a mother of a single child and was so patience till he turns one.. As he grew up my tolerance level declined so much.. repeatly cleaning all the time and in saving all the valuable things at home... But I admire at him how he can grasp few things very easily and his ability to remember at two yrs.. This strucks me that he s still young to know the do's and don't in life..

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Shikha Batra

| Jan 06, 2016

Completely agree with u on this Swetha! With age enthusiasm and tolerance level tend to go on a decline stage and I also believe second child see the unintended dampened spirits of parents due to many reasons such as work pressure,increasing age, pressure to earn money, change in priorities, to name a few. I am sure my Lil one would have definitely complained to me this unintentional bias had she seen my bringing up my first born. Good job! Keep writing Swetha!

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Arun Janarthanan

| Jan 06, 2016

I allowed my son to do his creations on walls without any regrets . even gave him blackboard but no use . lovely article .

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