Parenting

Dealing with a 8 year old son

Vikas
7 to 11 years

Created by
Updated on Jul 09, 2015

Hello there,   I have a 8 year old son who is very good in all that he takes up. In academics he has topped his class from past 2 years. He is excellent is drawing which has won him many accolades. He is equally good in his music, swimming and other sports activities.   From being a topper to scoring a "C" grade, his playing habits has become his major distracting point. So much so, that he postponed many of his homework and have started telling lies to his class teachers in order to play.   His absent mindedness has created a bad impression about him, at home and outside. So much so that he is often mocked by his peers and friends, which his aggressive nature is further aggravating it.   We (My wife and me) have started a silent war with him. We are not telling him anything, nor are helping him in his daily routines of bath and dressing up or asking him about his school and homework or test.   We have stopped paying attention to all his requests and demands in the hope that he will realize his mistakes and realise the same.   Do you think we are on the right track ? Guide us.   Thanks in advance    

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vikas

| Jul 10, 2015

Thanks a lot Simran and Meenu. I am truly thankful for your support and guidance. As they say, writting takes away half of your pain. Th moment i wrote this query, an inner instinct of mine told me to go and talk to him. The result from yesterday to today has drastically changed. We played together. Studied together and woke up together. He is a happy going kid. Thanks a lot for your support :-)

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vikas

| Jul 10, 2015

Thanks a lot Simran and Meenu. I am truly thankful for your support and guidance. As they say, writting takes away half of your pain. Th moment i wrote this query, an inner instinct of mine told me to go and talk to him. The result from yesterday to today has drastically changed

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vikas

| Jul 10, 2015

Thanks a lot Simran and Meenu. I am truly thankful for your support and guidance. As they say, writting takes away half of your pain. Th moment i wrote this query, an inner instinct of mine told me to go and talk to him.

  • Report
vikas

| Jul 10, 2015

Thanks a lot Simran and Meenu. I am truly thankful for your support and guidance. As they say, writting takes away half of your pain. Th moment i wrote this query, an inner instinct of mine told me to go and talk to him.

  • Report
vikas

| Jul 10, 2015

Thanks a lot Simran and Meenu. I am truly thankful for your support and guidance. As they say, writting takes away half of your pain. Th moment i wrote this query, an inner instinct of mine told me to go and talk to him.

  • Report
vikas

| Jul 10, 2015

Thanks a lot Simran and Meenu. I am truly thankful for your support and guidance. As they say, writting takes away half of your pain. Th moment i wrote this query, an inner instinct of mine told me to go and talk to him.

  • Report
Meenu

| Jul 10, 2015

Hi vikas, I think rather than having a silent war with him, maybe you should support him more. Treat it as a phase where he is growing up and stepping into pre-teens, when he wants to assert himself and find a locus of control. So, at this point be a greater friend to him. Spend some quality time with him, chit chat about your school days and how you made mistakes and prompt him, indirectly to share his feelings. he may connect more with you as you are the father than his mother. Share secrets, listen to him. Sit with him and help him draft his own timetable... how would he like it to be. Also, it is a phase and everyone goes thru it, so at this point even if he is not performing that well in studies, give him sometime... ensure that he doesn't go down than a certain level, but focus on his morale more.

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simran sharma

| Jul 10, 2015

You need to develop his interest back into studies. Ignoring will not work. Make him realise that he is going on the wrong track. this is the age when children usually go to wrong track. Spend quality time with him and tell him that he needs to balance his play and his studies. Try to be his friend. There is a possibility that something might be ticking it. Appreciate him for his good behaviour and ensure he have a learning approach towards studies and life .

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